Today

Today I:

• Spent most of the day making a photo slideshow for a wedding reception this weekend.
• Bought a new photo slideshow software, and it’s rockin’.
• Met with the bride to discuss portrait priorities, scheduling for this weekend.. and her veil, which I’m making custom for her tomorrow.
• Had a 4 year old home all day, bored out of her mind- constantly asking me to do things with her.
• Felt the momma guilt. But did play and read with said four-year-old often. She’s so stinkin’ cute I cannot deny her.
• Worked 12+ hours again.
• Forgot to eat. Like usual.
• Didn’t get something important done.
• Didn’t get paid. Again. What’s up with people not paying me lately? I despise having to track people down and remind them for payment again and again. I don’t usually have this problem.
• Stressed that I don’t have the money to pay my preschooler’s tuition tomorrow because people haven’t been making timely payments lately.
• Stressed that several of my web design clients have disappeared into thin air mid-project, pushing my next pay checks off.
• Stressed that my house is filthy and I have no time to clean it.
• Stressed that the economy is taking a head dive and worried how this might be affecting my business now and what I might be able to expect in the future.
• Realized that my son, the one who has serious adjustment issues, is going to sixth grade camp in a week.
• Took a lot of anti-anxiety meds. On top of it all, I’m still reeling from yesterday’s drama.
• Got in touch with a dear friend and mentor who I haven’t spoken to in 14 years.
• Had a pretty good day, despite it all.

I can’t wait to shoot the wedding this weekend. I really love my job. I just don’t know how I survive busy season every year. It’s just so much to balance. I really wish my assistant/nanny thing would have worked out. It’s so hard to find good help. And so, once again I’ll work and work and work and try to be a wife and mother too and barely survive until my next slow season.

Tomorrow will be another 12 hour workday. I think I can.. I think I can…